When it comes to dating, there are two different categories that most dating searches are divided into. The first of these focuses on casual sex, one night stands, and flinging without any strings attached. These are of course known as ‘casual dating’ sites and are used exclusively for this purpose.
The other side of the dating coin includes sites and gay dating apps that focus on connecting people for long term love and relationships. These are services that aim to help you meet and match other people for serious relationships and they are known as ‘Serious Dating’ sites.
In the world of gay dating, casual dating is by far one of the most popular ways that men meet. While that doesn’t mean there are little to no options for men to enjoy serious relationships with other men, gay dating can be difficult to work for you.
In this article we will tell you why gay dating online is so difficult and on which sites you should register for a long-term relationship: 1 × 1 of gay dating!
Top 6 Reasons Gay Dating Is So Difficult
There are many reasons homosexual men might find dating online difficult and the following list is just a selection of the challenges they face while dating.
However, these are some of the most common reasons gay men have dating difficulties:
1. The wave of casual gay dating sites and apps
Although casual dating apps for gay men have increased dramatically in recent years and gay men enjoy their accessibility to simple sex, the multitude of apps for casual gay sex is a double-edged sword.
With so many men focusing on the casual dating scene, it has become more difficult to find men who are interested in serious gay relationships, let alone serious dating sites or apps.
This means that many who are looking for serious intentions within the gay community are already looking at a smaller group of interested men. Try Flirteezy, it´s a good free casual dating App.
2. Unrealistic expectations
This is a fairly broad topic, but it relates to the difficulties gay men can have in finding a suitable match and the ideal type of person they would like to be with.
That’s in part because of the role casual dating has played in the community as it shaped what most consider to be the norm.
It can also refer to the self-image that many gay men have of themselves and the fear that they will not meet other people’s expectations.
Whether it comes from a history of discrimination or from discrimination within the gay community between the different ways of expressing themselves and showing one’s homosexuality, the struggle with unrealistic expectations has been and is a hurdle for many gay men looking to date.
3. Serious dating is still relatively new
Since gay marriage was not an option for the community until recently, so that engagement was actually out of the question for many gay men in the community from a legal point of view, it is no wonder that the casual dating scene as a whole is the was more popular way for gay dating.
Times have changed, of course, but the lasting effect is showing in the preference for casual one-night stands over open and reputable online gay dating services. For women who are looking for a serious relationship, try PinkCupid, the best way to find serious people.
4. The interests do not always coincide
For many gay men looking for a partner online, their partners may simply want things other than themselves.
This can be a series of ideas and values that do not match between the two, such as interests, goals in life, relationship desires, family planning, monogamy and so on.
If you are fundamentally different, it will be difficult to build something longer term. Even if opposites attract in some cases.
5. The community is not always available
After all, the gay community in your area may not be as vibrant as it is in other areas. In rural areas and smaller towns, there are few homosexual men who are serious about dating, which can cause you little success and a lot of trouble.
6. Age and attractiveness play a role
Especially for older gay men who came out late, it is more difficult to make contacts in the community. You have to keep throwing the net out because the big mainstream dating apps like Grindr and Tinder are more geared towards the younger generation.
Even if you are rather unsure about your appearance and your charisma, it will be more difficult for you. Since most apps work according to the Swipe & Match system, your profile should be in top condition.
Which reputable gay dating sites work best for finding committed relationships?
This is by no means a comprehensive list of all reputable gay male dating sites, but they are among the best on the market for a wide range of single men who are looking for a serious relationship but are experiencing some difficulty.
These dating sites are all LGBT-friendly, which will make it easier for you to feel comfortable there.
AdultFriendFinder
AdultFriendFinder is an American platform for sex contacts with millions of members. Affair and affairs can be found here as well as one-off sex contacts. Above all, AdultFriendFinder scores with the ability to get in touch with other users in a variety of ways. Anyone looking for sex contacts, whether man or woman, will find it here.
eHarmony
The focus of eHarmony‘s services is on building long-term relationships by finding compatible matches for each member. With tons of amazing features and compatibility analysis, you can understand why it is known as the # 1 Most Trusted Dating App for Singles. While the cost of premium membership is a bit high, it is a fantastic dating website with a lot of potential. At least if you have serious intentions.
Because of the many settings you can of course use eHarmony as a gay. Women can search for women and men for men. Because of the good algorithm it is perhaps one of the best dating websites for LGBTQ’s.
GayCupid
GayCupid.com is highly popular amongst the gay community, and this is proven based on their Google Play, 4 out of 5-star results, based on over 800 people. The website allows you to verify yourself, leaving you with a big green tick on your profile, so other users can feel safer knowing you have proven exactly who you are to the website. When using Gay Cupid, you can search for what sort of relationship you want by selecting from the list. This includes a pen pal, casual relationship, friendship, dating, or a long-term relationship, helping users distinguish what they are really after before contacting other members. In our opinion GayCupid is one of the best Gay Dating sites.
Grindr
One of the definitive location-based apps for gay dating. Grindr sets the bar for users when it comes to deciding whether to keep making casual acquaintances or looking for something more long-term. On Grindr you can find fetishists, couples, escorts and more.
But you’ll also hear some success stories from couples who met on Grindr and stayed together forever.
How to improve your chances of online dating
Given the difficulty gay men have when dating online, it may seem like an overwhelming situation. However, there are a few things you can do to improve your chances of dating homosexuals online if you are looking for a serious relationship.
First may be the most obvious, but stick to reputable partner searches. If you’re visiting a casual dating site and you’re expecting something other than casual sex, then you need to adjust your expectations.
In short, find your preferred type of relationship on the side that is aligned with that.
The next thing that will help immensely is lowering expectations of the type of person you are trying to find. Of course, you shouldn’t mess with everyone who ran along. Of course, attractiveness and attraction also play a role. And you shouldn’t settle for anything less than you care about.
Strive for the moon, but realize that there are many wonderful people out there who are not physically perfect. You might just be surprised if you keep an open mind.
If you’re looking for a serious relationship, don’t be afraid to make it clear to yourself and others that you are looking for just that. Remember that relationships among gay men these days are more than sociable.
Finally, if you are having trouble finding a partner in your immediate area, possibly because you live in a smaller town or in a rural area, you may want to broaden your search.
Cities are usually the best places to find other gay men, but that doesn’t mean they are only there.
Look for other small towns and villages within a reasonable distance, as other gays are more than likely to be in a situation similar to yours.
How to know which online dating website is right for you
Ultimately, this is something that you have to determine for yourself. You can best judge what is right for you. If you find a dating site that is comfortable for you to use, that gets good reviews, then give it a try!
If possible, try the site with a free version of the service. If you don’t like it, try another one.
There is a world of possibilities out there for you. While it can be difficult at times, and with good reason, it is by no means impossible to find your dream partner.
